Tuesday, June 21, 2016

What if ... my mother is not who I thought she was ....

Having a tough time.  Keeping it brief.  Looked forward to having my mother move two doors down from us at our new location in different city in WA.  Really looked forward to all the times we could share, all the things we might do together, all there was to see and show her.  Looked forward to all the resources she could make use of in this city whereas she did not have them where she had lived.  She is blind (legally), has diabetes, and as she had control of the narrative, sounded like was being isolated where she lived, little to no help from my two sisters who live there, weary of her neighbor who had been for years helping her with appointments, grocery store runs, lunches and fun times.
Learning a devastating reality now that she is here.....she has undiagnosed Narcissist Personality.  Has had for years, however, difference for me is that I have had years and years away from the damage of characteristics of narcissim.  Being exposed to my mother in ongoing day to day activities again after so many years away is startling to my senses, my sense of proprieties, boundaries, and on and on and on.

She's dead Jim - a quote from Star Trek that I exchange with my husband occasionally when we encounter life changing events, ie, when our family dog, Jake, at 15 years was unable to keep on.

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